Keep It Moving

Today when I was driving I came to a stoplight.  There was a gentleman walking across the street, and I could tell that he had trouble walking.  It looked like one of his legs was shorter than the other.  I felt sorry for him, hoping that no one was making fun of him and the way that he walked.

When he reached the other side of the street, my feelings of sympathy turned to a feeling of admiration.  He did not let his disability keep him from making the trek across the street.  He knew that he had somewhere he was going to, and he was determined to get there.  Rather than feeling sorry for him for how he walked, I focused on the fact that he was walking. 

At times we can look at our shortcomings and limitations and use them as an excuse to remain stagnant and afraid to move.  If we have to walk funny, crawl or have someone help us, we have to KEEP MOVING.  If I could go back to that moment today, I would give him a hug and thank him for being my inspiration. 

Thank You, God for giving me the strength to keep going.  No matter what . . . I will KEEP MOVING!

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Love . . .The 'Other' 4 Letter Word

I was having a discussion with some women in my writing group, and we had an exercise where we listed examples of good and bad characteristics of love.  For the good, we listed words such as:  caring, accepting, supportive, understanding and dependable.  For the bad, we listed words such as:  temporary, hateful, judgemental, conditional and hurting. 

All of the women admitted that these characteristics used were descriptive of men in their lives.  After reviewing our lists, I asked the women to internalize those characteristics.  How often are we judgemental, conditional and hateful toward ourselves?  Every time we make a mistake, we come down on ourselves harder than the world does. 

It's important that we look inside to find love for ourselves above all.  Regardless of who may hurt us, we should always be good to ourselves.  We can never love others fully until we learn to love who we are.

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Mother Earth

Mother Earth
on an African plane
heavy is my color
heavy is my frame
heavy is my spirit
heavy is my reign
heavy like nightfall
when the thief came

Mother Earth
on a slave ship
heavy are my tears
heavy are my lips
crying out to heaven
heavy are the whips
used to break my back
and cause my people to shift

Mother Earth
considered property
heavy are my songs
mental slavery
heavy is my womb
brown, little baby
heavy is the burden . . .
the mother in me

Mother Earth
teach me your strength
your wisdom . . .endurance
to go to great lengths
to achieve greatness
and not ride the fence
I want to be like you
to persevere . . . to go through

To Mother Earth
we all shall return
from dust to creation
ashes to urn
fan the forever flames
give her a turn
to live in her glory

let me live and learn


Happy Black History Month

What's Your Price?

I was watching The History Channel this morning, and a program detailing the history of "America" was founded.  The program discussed how RUM was the most precious commodity because it was used to purchase Africans from other Africans.  I felt somewhat angry . . . I understand that what took place was over 400 years ago, but to think that people would sell each other into slavery for alcohol is hard to fathom.

I thought about our current situation as Black people in the world, and how easily people sell themselves or sacrifice others just to make money or have material gain.   It's true that my ancestors are the only race that did not voluntarily migrate to America.  There is so much widespread corruption in African nations, tribalism and war.  We understand that the Europeans started some of the division, but it's hard to blame the Europeans entirely when it was brother against brother and sister against sister. 

Instead of focusing on personal gain . . . what is the price of unity?  What is the price of togetherness?  Something to think about . . .

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To The Good Men . . .

This post is just a thank you to the men out there that know how to treat a lady like a lady . . . ones who know how to be gentlemen, good fathers, faithful, good communicators and support systems for their families.

I was reminded this weekend about how much "Good Men" are under-appreciated.  I know a woman who has a GREAT man and she treats him like nothing.  She says that he is 'too nice', disrespects him and even questions his manhood. 

I realize that there are times when people take a good thing for granted, and by the time they realize how good they have/had it, it's too late.  To all of the men out there who know how to love . . . please know that there is ONE woman who appreciates you.  Please continue to be good men. 

Over-n-out!

Taking Control

Hello Ladies and Gents!

This post is about ME.  I am making a declaration for ALL of the world to see that from today on, I am taking control of my life.  And by taking control, I mean to be the best Buttrfli that I can be.

Most of my posts are written to be informational and to engage dialogue, but it's also very cathartic.  As I write, I learn more about myself and what I need to do.  I can't give direction unless I've also walked that road.  I can't be an example unless I am a woman of my word. 

I'll keep you informed . . . and if you want to see a shooting star FOLLOW ME!  (cause I'm going places) :-)

Be happy . . .be humble . . .be blessed!

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Pay Attention

Ladies, have you ever had a man who is only nice to you when he needs something?  Do you have a man that you know is not faithful, or a liar, yet you hope that one day he will come around to being the man you want him to be?  Do you have a man who is physically, verbally or mentally abusive to you and tells you that it's YOUR fault he behaves this way because he "LOVES" you?

It's time to pay attention to the signs.  Maya Angelou said it best when she said, “The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”   I know that as women we have a tendency to want to fix and save people.  When you have a man who victimizes women, he will use you until he uses you up and then move on to the next person to victimize.  But guess what?  That victim does not have to be you.

I understand that there are also women who victimize men.  No one deserves to be used.  All relationships should be built on mutual love and respect.  I say it in most of my posts and I will say it again . . . YOU DESERVE THE BEST!

Take a look at your relationship and honestly determine if your mate is in it for the right reasons.  Ask God for wisdom.  Value yourself. 

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Poetry for Discussion

Here is a poem from my new book of poetry, Song of Sally II:  The Dedication.

POPULATION CONTROL

modern day

genocide

brown, round babies

crushed

with the pull of the

vacuum

‘cause the Mama felt it was

‘too soon’

for her to conceive

every day

a young warrior is pulled

from the strength of the womb

sucked or expelled

into a tomb

because someone is consumed

with what they feel is

convenience

they don’t have to hear

the young warrior cry

they don’t have to say

goodbye

they deny the validity

of its existence

because they couldn’t see the feet

or hear the

heartbeat

‘it was only tissue’

like a tumor

or cancer

no gender, no soul

no conscience

no answer

laying on that table

reckless birth control

someone told you “it’s YOUR BODY

it’s nobody’s business

just pay your $400

and we can end this

INCONVENIENCE”

and we say

YES

never mind

that young warrior

conceived by God’s design

could have been the next creation

to rebuild a nation

what you see as the easy way

is actually to control

a population

of young brothers and sisters

who are viewed as a

drain

on the economy

more like a stain

with nothing to contribute

nothing to gain

but what if that seed was created

to save a continent

or to one day become

President

and while the

government

gives you ‘free’ option . . .

coercion

to have your

abortion

remember . . .

the very fact

that you were chosen for birth

signifies that you have value

and worth

so before you create or take life

THINK FIRST

3 Little Words

I remember an article that I read about people with "Abusive Personalities" that I thought I would share with my blog readers.  Question:  Have you ever met a man who told you after a few days those three little words . . . I Love You?  Although it sounds and feels good, let me tell you why you should run (and run quickly).  Here are three points to remember:

1.  Any man who says that he loves you after a few days is trying to appeal to your emotion.  He may be experiencing feelings for you, but love is a very strong word and concept. 

2.  Most likely he is trying to hook you emotionally so that he can seal the deal.  Men who move quickly are trying to get you emotionally anchored because they can't maintain the 'nice-guy-act' for too long.

3.  Any man who is serious about you will take the time to get to know you. 

Just because someone says that they love you, doesn't necessarily translate into action.  Take the time to see if he SHOWS love . . . not just SPEAKS love. 

You deserve the best, Ladies.  Don't settle for less.

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Being Mom & Dad

How many of our black women are both Mom and Dad to their children? 

I was thinking about this, comparing the current mentality of our black families to that of slavery.  Black men were only useful for planting seeds to breed the next generation of workers (slaves) who would then grow up to repeat the cycle.  Black men were regarded as nothing more than animals, forced to move from one woman to the next without creating that familial bond.

Now we see so many of our black children growing up in single parent homes, as if that is the norm.  Men creating numerous children, yet being a true father to none.  When does it end?  When will we take back our families and start to show our children that families can be made up of TWO parents?  I was once a single mother, having to be both the nurturer and disciplinarian . . . masculine and feminine.  And I regarded this as 'normal'.  It took a strong man to show me how much my son and I needed that strong man in our lives.

To any of the men out there who have been playing the role of the slave . . . today is the day to change.  Go be the parent your children need you to be.  Don't let the cycle continue.

What are your thoughts?

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Fear of Failure/Fear of Success

Woke up this morning thinking about my life, and where I am going.  I saw success in my future . . . the ability to have everything that I desire . . . and somehow the thought scared me.  What would I do with the success?  I had a serious reality check.  But I realized that this is an issue that we face every day.

We know that there are changes that need to be made in our life, but we don't feel equipped to make those changes or we don't believe that those changes can be maintained.  I almost felt like slapping myself, and slapping you, too!  The only person who determines your success or failure is YOU!  The only person that is hindering me is ME. 

So from today, going forward, I endeavor to walk through the fear and doubt and FIND a way to get where I want to get, and I challenge you to do the same.  If God can get us there, can He not maintain us?  I believe that Franklin D. Roosevelt said it best when he said:

 "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself." 

Be encouraged . . . be blessed.  Nothing is impossible as long as you believe!

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